Friday, November 21, 2014

Ransetsu


the childless woman,
how tender she is
to the dolls!                           © Ransetsu (Tr. Blyth)


challenge goals:
5-7-5 syllables
+ a seasonword (kigo)
+ a cuttingword (kireji, in western mostly interpunction)
+ a moment as short as the sound of a pebble thrown in water
+ interchangable first and third line
+ a deeper meaning 

ultrasound:


ten tiny fingers
reaching out toward the heaven
profusion of tears


~

cats, cats, and more cats
place setting for each feline
childless couple


-

autumn leaves crumble
glorious splendor over
Perseus shines bright

(for TJ)

8 comments:

  1. Hi Dolores ~~ My fave vote will go to the middle one, cats, cats, et.al. The first was really a tear jerker, I could read 'between the lines.' Cats, et.al. reminds me of a children's play we saw at Wimbledon, London, UK, at the Broadway Children's Theatre. It was called "Too Many Pelicans." I thought they would never stop coming in, all were stuffed plush toys, really cute. Oh yes, we sat on the floor with our granddaughter, age 3. We couldn't do that any more.
    ..
    ..

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  2. So well done --- from the heartbreaking, to the humorous, to the infinite :)

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  3. The first one is a elegant - the plea of the child
    Well Done!

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